Top Ten Things Overheard in the ER at Midnight

Recently I found myself with time to kill in the Emergency Room. Don't worry, no one was hurt or seriously ill; my Nona wasn't feeling well, and called the Ambulance so we drove to the hospital to wait for her. Once we found out she was only dehydrated and that she was going to be just fine, they just needed to put her on IV for awhile, we had nothing to do but wait. And listen...

#10: “Ah the ol’ hockey-puck-in-the-nose thing”

#9: “Not me. I don’t do cocaine. What is it? And how do you DO it, anyways? Do you drink it?” Suuuure, buddy…

#8: “Oh, you mean like people sniff the stuff? I had no idea.”

#7: “I drilled a hole in my hand…kinda…”

#6: “And whose pee is this?”

#5: “You can’t cuff me, dude, I got a bad shoulder…”

#4: “Have you checked your poop recently? What color was it?”

#3: “It’s gonna take more than a bag of water to fix that one…” -Dad (I think his empathy was fading)

#2: “Is there an outlet here? My phone’s dying and I need to tweet this…” (guess who said that one)

#1: “We should’ve gone to RCH – they have a Tim Hortons.” –Mom

I hope you don’t find yourself in the Emergency Room anytime soon, but if you do, I hope it is not for anything too serious, and I hope you have good hearing and a paper and pen with you…


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